Friday, May 2, 2008

Tears Over Broken Dishes

I didn't realize until this morning that i must've been feeling a little stressed out lately.

I've had to get up pretty early every morning this week, and i worked late a couple of days; then today (Friday), my husband needed to take me to work 2 hours early (we share a car). So i am in the kitchen this morning around 4:50 or so, packing up a serving of the chilli mac my husband lovingly stayed up late last night to prepare for my lunch, and when i go to put the dish back in the refrigerator, it slips out of my hand, flips upside-down, and lands on the kitchen floor, breaking my only serving dish into about ten pieces, but somehow keeping all the contents clean because it all stayed on the plastic wrap that was covering the bowl.

What did i do? I should've rejoiced that the contents were saved, i suppose, but i did not. Instead, i stood in my kitchen, a grown woman, stared hopelessly at the mess on the floor, and burst into loud sobbing tears. I continued to stand their and bawl helplessly like a bratty child for over a minute before my loving man, apparently hearing of my distress all the way in the bedroom, came into the kitchen, cleaned up my mess while i continued to sob, gave me a hug, consoled me, and told me to stop crying and go fix my make-up.

The reason i'm telling you this story is because it reminds me of another memory of Mormor's house. I was nine or ten at the time, and for some reason, it was a big deal to me that i was getting to help with the dishes. I have a memory of a large stack of drying dishes in the drainer, and i think i went to remove one to put it away, when it fell on the floor and broke into so many bits of broken ceramic.

What i remember most clearly is how dismayed i was and how long i cried over that bowl! My loving mother came to my rescue that time. She kept telling me, "it's o.k." but i wouldn't have it. I was horrified that i had been entrusted with the welfare of these dishes but had missed the mark and shattered the very bowl i was appointed to care for.

This morning i was saddened at my apparent waste of my husband's kindness toward me, in seeing to it that i would have a good lunch to take to work.

It's funny, really, but i didn't think so this morning. =)

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